What is normal?
Mood swings are normal. During pregnancy or your baby’s first year, there may be times when you do not feel like yourself. Maybe you will have some trouble managing your emotions. Or maybe you will feel overwhelmed, yet still be able to care for yourself and your baby. After delivery, your hormones levels change, you lack sleep and your body is recovering from childbirth. Together these things make mood swings more likely. These feelings are normal and expected.
Mood disorders are more common than we think. No parent should ever feel ashamed of feeling depressed or anxious, and there is help available. Talking with your healthcare provider about your feelings is very important. Your healthcare provider can give you advice on safe treatment options or connect you with other professionals who can help. Watch this video for more information.
What should I do about these normal mood swings?
Experiencing these types of feelings is a sign to take special care of yourself. Ask your partner, a trusted friend, or a family member to watch your baby. Or, team up with another parent to share childcare so you can rest or take a walk. Normal mood swings or baby blues last about 2 weeks. If the feelings don’t go away, or they get worse after 2 weeks, talk to your health care provider.
PARENT QUOTE
“Looking back, I definitely think I suffered from postpartum depression with my first child. I went to my 6-week check-up and sobbed the entire time. I remember my midwife asking me questions about how I was feeling. But, I must have convinced her I was okay because nothing came of it. I went back to work after 12 weeks, and I felt like a zombie all of the time. Everything overwhelmed me.
One day, when my daughter was about 6 months old, she wouldn’t stop crying. I tried to soothe her, but nothing worked. At one point, I wanted to shake her I was so frustrated. Thankfully, I recognized that what I was feeling was not a healthy reaction. I carefully put her down in her crib where she was safe, left the room, and closed the door. Then I called my husband at work. I cried and cried. He told me I did the right thing and left work to come home and help.
I talked to friends about it afterward which helped. It was a super hard time in my life. I did not know it was not normal until I had my son and did not experience such deep feelings of overwhelm. I wish I would have known to ask for help.” ~ Shea, parent of 2
What is not normal?
Postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety are common, but they are not “normal” feelings that will go away on their own. Ask for help from your healthcare provider if you:
- Have feelings of intense anxiety (worry) and/or nervousness that hit with no warning
- Feel foggy and have difficulty completing tasks
- Feel “robotic,” like you are just going through the motions
- Excessive crying
- Sadness
- Mood swings
- Feel very anxious (worried) around the baby and your other children
- Have scary, upsetting thoughts that do not go away
- Have little interest in things that you used to enjoy (feel disconnected)
- Feel guilty and feel like you are failing at parenthood
- Difficulty accepting parenthood
- Changes in sleeping or eating habits
NOT SURE WHAT TO DO ABOUT POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION?
Don't wait! You have options:
- Contact your doctor's office or the nurse's advice line so they can connect you to mental health services in your area.
- Call Postpartum Support International at 1-800-944-4PPD (4773) to speak to a volunteer who can provide support and resources in your area.
- Go to your insurance plan's website. Look for "Behavioral Health" providers in your area to make an appointment.
- Call the number on your insurance card to find a provider.
What if things get really bad?
Postpartum depression and anxiety can become very dangerous for parents and their babies. Call your doctor right away if you…
- have baby blues lasting longer than two weeks
- feel hopeless and total despair
- have panic attacks
- out of touch with reality (you may see or hear things that other people do not)
- fear you cannot take care of your baby
- Call 9-1-1 if for immediate help if you feel you may harm yourself or your baby.
Other numbers to call
In addition to 9-1-1, you can call:
• The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for free and confidential emotional support. They talk about more than suicide and are a great resource for anyone who needs to talk.
• The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). They offer free, confidential, 24-hour support in English and Spanish.
Partners can help! Share this resource with your partner so they know what signs to look for, too. Bookmark it so you can easily find it once your baby is born.